The Awakening (incomplete)

Your beats...the box that vibrates as you speak
Reminds me of...
Crumpled sheets leaving imprints onto skin
Soft gusts of warm air brushing against fine hairs...
Leaving chills...
Killing the loss of feeling btwn thighs
An awakening touch of repetitive motion
An over-time of thrusts searching for perfection as two worlds combine...
Your beats...the box that vibrates as you speak
Reminds me of...
Drenched skin
A type of humidity too hard to breathe...
That sometimes needs to be released momentarily during that time of ease...
Kisses that seem to have endless power over mind, body and soul...

[Incomplete - Work In Progress]

Coy (old stuff)

Everyone wants to jump on your "dick"
And I'm supposed to feel priveledged because I've had the opportunity?
I have been here before
Your "popularity"
And will be here after "reality" settles in
When your "dick" is just like everyone elses to your groupies
Because they'll never see in you
What I have seen for so long
They'll never care for you
Like I have...
All they see is an instrument of momentary enjoyment
Once the fun becomes repetitive, the speed slows down
The cum runs thin...and she's harder to please
She'll throw you away without a second thought
And I'll help dust you off
For the next campaign of "the greatness that I am"
Just for you to sweep me back underneath your rug when another fun "ride" catches your eye...
Just for you to shoot me with your words attempting to create non-existent boundaries to shield your heart from the inevitable...

Success '09

Our lowest moments are amplified
And highlighted
Our moments of achievements they do nothing
But find reasons as to why they are undeserving
The pressure to succeed is a consistent battle
Freedom has yet to ring
The shackles may have been physically removed
But the chains on our brains are still here...

Why must we be lowered?
And degraded?
To receive the highest acceptance of achievement

Tempest

I search within myself
For an explanation
How could this happen?
I had plans

I let one distraction
Alter my dreams
You came in
Disguised like all the others

Dressed in red
My rose colored glasses saw green
I took one step
And before I knew it
I'd stepped into darkness

Sipped down spirits
Trying to disappear from my discomfort
Lost my balance
And I fell

The room grew still
Darkness hovered over me
I stayed in a clouded state
It was then when your horns appeared
I couldn't speak

My voice muted and I saw you
Laughing
Crying inside while I felt
my body break

It wasn't until
I submerged in water
The cloud left me
The daze raised
And I felt the pain
That I realized that I was broken
Not only on my body
But my spirit

I wept alone
Forever have I been scarred
Never to fully heal
I'll always be reminded
Of that night I let you in

Immaturity (a simple mind)

Lusting
Loving
Acting
Reacting
I want you
I hate you
I love you
Don't stop
I need you
Call out for me
Remind me
What happened?
I thought you...
You knew me
I knew you
We had this
We had us
I want you
I need you
Stop lying
Tell me why
I called you
Called out for you
You never came
I cried for you
Said I'd die for you
You walked away
Ran fast
Disappeared on me
Now you want in
I'm seeing it now
Your side
This was me
Doing this to you
And I lost it
I lost it
I lost it
Then
I lost you

Self, Where are you?

I wish that I could
Knock on the corridors of my own mind
Travel backwards & stand in front of my former self
Self, why are you here?
Jaded in every way imaginable
You knew you, before they did
Before you slipped and let them in
Before you gave away pieces of you
Traces that you can't get back
Moments that you should have never known
You lost you, when you questioned you
You got lost when you, for a second believed that you were unworthy
I want to stand in front of you
And say "you are worthy"
Remind you that what seems "too good to be true" is for you, own it before it disowns you
I wish you knew who you could become
Only if, you knew you before you let the wrong ones come, give them pleasure
Feed their egos
Let them use you for whatever you did best, in their eyes
And when they were done
Each time, you became less of you
Uncertain of your worth, character & talent
You, lost you... Don't lose you, you have you...
Instead I can't speak to you
That you, that is me
That demonstrated self mutilation of an emotional kind
It's me who failed me
I can't blame skeletons for their mistakes
I didn't have to let them in
I can't speak to the former me
But the present me, the you, that is me
I see you again... Unused & rare
I see you
I found me, buried in ruins if a broken soul, laughing to hide tears...
I missed you
I missed ME

Gray Matter

Hanging on to your touch
By the strands you have me
Adorning your scent
Listening as the sound
Your sound
Bounces off walls & releases me
I can't wait to bury you in my arms
Close my eyes & fall in...
Lost in your shades of gray